Boggenstrovia's 6th and 7th Bits of Christmas... Cold, damp turkey...

So here we are again after technical problems, back again with the twelve bits of Christmas and in honour of not being able to blog for a few days. This time we are talking Turkey or more like food at Christmas, as its the time of the year when we are meant to eat drink and be merry. But who can be after four days of food? You're usually laid up with the Alka-Seltzer and a gas mask after all of that.


So where can we start? How about some pre-dinner action? Fancy a drink?

"Blimey, I'm so drunk I can see an animated deer..."

Babycham, the bubbly tipple... Often found at the back of cupboards, brought out at Christmas to bring sophistication of the big day. It was often a worry that an animated deer would advertise it, what exactly was that suggesting? Two or three of these and you'll be seeing Bambi and saying "Huey... Lewis and the News.." after more of them. Along with Malibu which would be seen at this time, was it a ploy to think that we were all in some sun-kissed nirvana, rather then looking at drizzle run down a window accompanied with battleship grey skies and sleet? 

Apart from egg-nog, this ranks amongst the drink to curl a lip, but of course the ladies would advertise the more exotic fare, from Tia Maria with the sultry lady to Lorraine Chase wafting back from a week in Marbella for some Campari or even Rigsby and Joan Collins camping it up for some Cinzano. People say that that advert was more popular then the programmes of that time, but the tin foil medal has to go to Jenny Clulow... Ms Clulow, announcer on TVS had spent time advertising Contreau on the television... Wheither she had a bottle hidden under the desk, to help her get through another episode of 'The Littlest Hobo' I don't know...

And now onto the main part of the meal, there's only one Turkey we can have around here...

"Turkey..."

"Oh, stuff it! You've cost us a holiday!"

Yes, Mr Turkey... The truth goes he thought he heard the previous person's answer of 'Name something you can stuff' now from there where exactly did he get that all the answer were Turkey I don't know... Along with the Beethoven/Chopin clip which gets dragged out to show 'Ha, ha, ha! Aren't they stupid contestants' this is one which rankles with me. How exactly was he daft? He got big points for it, it could have been worse he could have dropped trousers and mooned the audience... By being 'dumb' he got smart and this clip is a goto clip for any quizshow blooper compliations, wherever you are Sir, alive or dead. I salute you for being a maverick and showing the way of others to follow.

So you've settled down after your pudding and need something to wash it down with?

How about an Avenger, Aunt Sally and a lady who's now a doctor?

"Keen bedside manner? Just as long as she warmed her thermometer!"

Arriving back not from Luton Airport, but the local cornershop Diane Keen and Una Stubbs come back to Gareth Hunt's pad for some bean shaking with Nescafe, before the Gold Blend couple jumped into bed this was class... Mike Gambit inviting two classy ladies in for coffee, now that sound like the start of a film! But no matter, because a coffee solved it all, with the aroma of the beans and that famous handshake of course. The reputation of the brand was such that Gareth was the long time face of Nescafe, but I'd much rather have him then George Clooney trying to flog frothy coffee to us, but on the opposite side, there's people who hate coffee...

Time for tea anyone? Though the post meal thing can be set off with a nice brew though, for so long the chimps would advertise PG Tips until one day birds took over. Birds, I ask you! If anything birds would remind you of custard and not tea at all... So how do you modernise PG Tips for a new age, still the monkey link? Well, you call on a woolly monkey of course and his friend Al! Now Monkey and Al had been through the ITV digital fiasco, with us thinking that another character gone for a burton, but credit to Mother, the ad agency and Comic Relief that monkey was brought back to his rightful place, advertising tea of course... This made the brand even bigger it was before, with giveaway of free woolly monkeys two Christmas' ago now. Sealing Monkey's place as one of the best characters along with the Smash Aliens and Homepride's Fred as well...So for now, I leave you with Monkey and Al and say bottoms up, thanks for being patient through these technical troubles of the past few days... And cheers!

"Gawd save 'im and all who drink from his mug!"

Jack's Bean and gone...

So here we are, the first of my 12 bits leading up to Christmas. Taking the festive season and making it drink so much Egg Nog and Absinthe, that come Boxing Day it'll be wondering about a recipe for scrambled eggs...

Starting off with...

1. Pantomines...

"He's behind you!" The regular call heard at theatres up and down the country over December and Early January, usually when someone's drink is split... Either that the refrain of children excited by sweets and also a character searching for someone. The panto has developed over the years from the early Harlequinade to today's sophisticated lights and music shows, in modern times the attraction is the stars who are in the panto itself. Taking its lead from Music Hall, the great entertainers have always appeared. From Pop stars to comedians and sports stars, they have each done their turns. Each story in turn has been adapted for the major star to show off their talent, for instance Rolf Harris would do his Jake the Peg act in the middle of Cinderella. Which bears no relationship to the plot itself, but it gave the chance to for others to shine. 


The dame is a key role in any pantomine, acting as a foil for the comical turn such as Buttons but also entertaining the audience in themself. The role has been filled with performers with the magnitude of  Chris Harris famous in the South for his time presenting 'Hey Look That's Me!' but also the quality of Les Dawson, Dawson is the master of the dame. His style, the demeanour and also the way he sells the role to the audience.... A true pro...

In myself, my experiences of panto are sort of mixed really from the Kings Theatre in Portsmouth seeing the great stars performing and getting up on stage with Brian Cant to tell an awful joke. But in meeting the great man was enough, but in that same performance... Major embarassment... When Lorraine Chase was playing Aladdin and was at a crucial scene when she finds the lamp originally, guess who shouted at the top of his voice as the lone voice "Rub the Lamp!" Which she replied "Thanks..." I could have nearly died, thinking back on it... Not the best move at all... Thinking over all the stars I saw in panto, it encouraged my love of Light Entertainment...

"Its Bobby Davro... Who?"

This gem comes from 2009 when Bobby Davro, and Mickey Rooney starred in panto in Milton Keynes... Milton Keynes isn't funny in itself, but it comes from the tradition of the stars being put into the panto who maybe don't fit as such... When Frank Bruno went into panto, it was because he was famous for his boxing but with the trend for reality stars now it seems that panto has changed into a vehicle for people who may have been on the television soon enough. The nature of this has been shown in the previous year when Britt Ekland came out of the jungle and to the Kings Theatre, it might be good publicity for the show itself. But with the currency of this, it leads to more people coming to the theatre and also something as such with their effect. 

So what else is there? Maybe a bit of festive time ads, involving panto... This from 1987 with Children's ITV , in which it feels right to be involved with panto time...

More fun here on Saturday... Enjoy people!

I have a dream! Its Ted Rogers on Family Fortunes?!

I had a dream last night, nothing new there then. But it was the nature of it which got me thinking, number one I must have been watching Challenge last night and two, it would work...

 What would? I'm hearing you saying, well the idea that I'm going to put out there maybe strange to some but to others it might get some people thinking 'Hmmm... That might work!'

 My dream was that Ted Rodgers was presenting Family Fortunes, alright it never happened in real life but it seemed to work and it seemed right somehow. It might have been the product of some many gameshows in a day, thought that got me thinking which hosts could switch shows and the show would just as good. But it did once happen though, in a Christmas edition of Sale of the Century on January 2nd 1981 it happened. Nicholas Parson was a contestant along with Tom O'Connor and Derek Batey with Steve 'Pyramid Game and voice-over man' Jones asking the questions of them. Plus Batey and Parsons appeared with Bob Monkhouse in a celebrity edition of Family Fortunes, so two examples there and also the tale I've told you about the potential swap of Monkhouse and Bruce Forsyth when Michael Grade wanted Family Fortunes for Bruce.

"Should old acquittance be forgot..."

If Ted Rogers could be taken out of 3-2-1 and put into Family Fortunes, that would mean a space there and I think that maybe Michael Barrymore or Brian Conley would be perfect choice to join Dusty, Caroline and Lynda. With their all round entertainment skills they would be able to handle anything the show would throw at them, plus the rapport with the acts as well would match the enthusiasm of the contestants. Maybe in hindsight Conley would have been the host after Rogers to take over or to refresh the show, but with Barrymore doing the show that would leave Strike It Lucky open for a new host...

Strike It Lucky is a simple format really, not saying that it is a cheap format. But in the right hands it can be done well, part of the time the format with Barrymore is him doing his act interacting with the public. First of all, Les Dennis showed his ease at doing that on Family Fortunes, so he could be my choice, though hang on  ... Maybe what about Joe Pasquale, his chance came with the revived Price is Right. His sillyness provided to put anyone at their ease, so Pasquale would go there.

Thought The Price is Right was a quandry in itself even before the late Leslie Crowther too his place in asking people to 'Come on Down!' Joe Brown, along with Russ Abbott was considered to present the show, Abbott in himself was said to have asked if he could have Bella Emberg as a hostess. So maybe Abbott though subverting the format was the was to go, something which would become commonplace in years further to come. Brown himself had been the host of Square One for Granada, but being seen as a man with a common touch getting close with people who would trust him, as the same would said for Bruce Forsyth and Joe Pasquale. 

"Come on Down!"

For The Price is Right, even through that onto into Whodunnit which had Edward Woodward and Jon Pertwee as its presenters between 1972 and 1978 which took an almost Cluedo-esue format with a panel trying to work out who committed a fictional murder as in the board game, showing that in a show a host can be interchangeable within a format. Win, Lose or Draw had three during its daytime version including Danny Baker and Bob Mills, not including Darren Day doing a 'Teen' version and Liza Tarbuck doing the 'Late' version. Its not so much that hosts can jump from one show to another, but when a format is put around a host, it fits like a glove but when watching a show just think that a host maybe have been up for other shows as well...

But how about Win, Lose or Draw? Well, why not give it a former contestant? I'm not talking about a celebrity who appeared on their but someone who was a member of the public... That man who would be king would be Johnny Vegas, he appeared on the show as an up and coming comedian but surely he would a good choice for a revived version of the show. Though as an interesting aside, Danny Baker also appeared during Bob Mills time as host, this time as a celebrity in week 5 of the 1995 series. Little is known about where executives get inspiration from for choosing a host for a show, sometime they will look upon it as maybe finding someone who's been out of the public eye to being pulled into a role or maybe coming from left field. 

Left field? What about a cockney taking on a children's quiz show? Well, Colin Nutley wanted Mike Reid to present Runaround in 1975, by thinking his firm but fair style could work with kids and it did over two spells between 1975 and 1976 before returning in 1978 to the programme's end in 1981. Though Leslie Crowther and Stan Boardman were host in the intervening years, taking it to today who could do it? There's one man for the job, the love of the quirky... Londoner... and always funny... How about Danny Baker? There's left field for you! Baker could take the items and give it his own brand of spin... But what about this for a link? Gary Crowley who filled in for Baker on his BBC London show whilst undergoing treatment, did Poparound from Central... The last time the format was put to a series, so maybe it would have come full circle in that way.

"Oh hello! I want to suck your blood, Mike..."

"Get out of it, Charlie!"

We can only theorise about what might be, but one host might be good for another's position... John Humphrys for the Generation Game anyone?

Dusting off the cobwebs...

So Challenge has decided in their wisdom to bring out the big guns for the Autumn meaning that they are around again to showing 3-2-1, now that Sky has taken over Challenge it means that along with Deal or No Deal coming to the channel other shows are due an airing from the same cannon.

ITV was a powerhouse of gameshows from the late 70's to the mid 90's, as such both Bruce Forsyth and Bob Monkhouse switching between the BBC and ITV during that period. I remember watching these show as a child whenever they were on and it was like another world away from my own. Apart from Play Your Cards right, which at that time and still now has the most exciting and lively start to a gameshow. For the early 80's it was big time for Brucie coming off the back off his 'Big Night', yet the tales about Michael Grade wanting what turned into Family Fortunes are available from books, the internet and other media. It felt right for Bruce, taking on that role and its success stretched throught out the 80's with revivals as well.

But many of the gameshows are forgotten now, let me lead by the hand as we go for gold or strike it rich in Boggenstrovia's Guide to shows which have been forgotten by the public...

1. "A difference of opinion here Geoffrey..."

Winner Takes All, the only gameshow to combine general knowledge and betting. Starting in 1975 with Jimmy Tarbuck at the helm until 1986, it was a strange affair to the young child who didn't know anything about betting at all. All I knew is if they got an answer right, they got a whole load of points for it. I didn't know what 10-1 was, I had heard it on World of Sport but what it actual meant was a whole different matter.

Jimmy was the man with the cash even at the start of episodes when he brought it on in a suitcase, little wonder that Securicor wasn't there to protect him with something like that. Though for Play Your Cards Right's titles, the original titles to Winner Takes All seemed like a psychotropic affair. Numbers, thousands of Tarbys and lots and lots of colours, later on the titles were a bit more calmer...

"Suited, booted and ready to go.."

In the final, two contestants would battle it out for £1000 with the winner getting the chance to get more money by coming back the next week but if they lost they would only get the £100 losers prize. So the greed was there, for the people who wanted it plus also the spangly sets. Well, a spangly curtain at the beginning for the contestants smile over in a circle, but with a spinning Yorkshire Chevron as well. Yorkshire loved the Chevron to do things in their gameshows, just to make you more scared if you weren't already scared enough of it. Poking itself around the door with a maniacal smile on its face, playing thousands of Tarbys coming towards you in your sleep...

2. "Punchlines!"

The Saturday teatime show which would be the cousin of Celebrity Squares but wouldn't write to it at Christmas. With Lennie 'TSW's Opening Show" Bennett at the helm nothing could go wrong really, by its nature all it was was making jokes to their  'Punchlines'. See what that they did there? With eight guests supplying the punchlines and to confuse the situation, they would change their boxes to confuse the contestants or put another way to make a joke sounds more rude then it already was. For three years between 1981 and 1984, even taking in an FA Cup Final appearance on the big day itself to get viewers away from the BBC. Taking in the atmosphere were Matthew Kelly and singer Rose Marie who made regular appearances through the series, with celebrity guests teaming up with a member of the public and when they got to 150 points they would win the game and the losing contestant got a Lennie Bennett doll during the first two series, a odder consolation prize I cannot think of. But after series three, they got some champagne and some glasses, so from the son of Lennie to something to drown their sorrows.

"Who'll bid me for this Gus Honeybun?"

It was another show with strange titles, not animated but in 3D. I think it was just a game by the television industry to see who could make the most lavish titles for the least money, it was a case Lennie ruled the gameshow universe for a while like all new gameshows. Whatever show was put in front of people, it was lapped up quicker then an analogical situation. I wish Challenge would put this on their schedule, maybe I'm a sadist for the show but it was good, well in my mind it was.

Two to be going on with there, it maybe strange to say that maybe a move to Freeview has saved Challenge judging by the number of people who are watching again, from the days when it shared time with The Family Channel when it first launched on Sky. But looking at the list on Wikipedia of the shows which they have shown over all that time, it reveals that a lot of shows could be shown. But its become a very British channel again, taking shows like 3-2-1 and Blankety Blank and putting them on the channel again. Something to say about it, is that they have settled in nicely and with a presence on twitter as well @ChallengeTV 

Maybe a hint or two could be sent to those who run it to put some more archive shows on there, dust off the cobwebs and give us some Punchlines!

Shame about the show...

What makes a show real? Realism or a mixture of stories with something to say? Now Shameless has reached 100 shows, it has changed drama and made a debate about how it should be. Some people may see it as chavs and naer-do-wells upto no good while other may see it as the best drama in a long time. In terms of kitchen sink drama it has pushed the boundaries to the edge, learning that the basis for its drama should be what people see everyday. Of course people don't always live on a council estate, they may live in the country or in a town, but they can recognise characters they know in a show.

But these types of dramas have always tried to hold a mirror upto the nation at various time and said "Have a good look at yourself and see what you see.." Now people may not like what they see, other may see themselves and others may start to see what they are becoming. Through films such as Kes and also Saturday Night and Sunday Morning which reflected a realism which people were crying out for in the 1960's and 1970's came through a spirit, almost akin to their own properties. As we look at the 80's for example with Alan Bleasdale's Boys from the Blackstuff, showing the situation with employment as people got laid off from jobs and had to fight to survive in the atmosphere which had been created at that time. The mantra of Yosser Hughes being 'Gissa Job' was never so true at those times.

Fast forwarding to today, Shameless fills the gap where once costume drama would have filled and the characters are as compelling as any in Dallas. For Frank Gallacher, has become an idol to some but also a clarion call to others. Through the riots recently, people were screaming about this, that and everything. It is convient to show people reclaiming their cities when they think its appropriate, but for the small person it doesn't hold much truck to them. I wouldn't say that it could be claimed that I was a chav myself but in Shameless its the need for something which exists in our minds only. The need for putting everyone in the same box, there are good and bad people out there, never I could say that in judgement I could pick everyone on either side. I might be right, I might be wrong... It might be Shameless to say, that Shameless has pushed the boundaries again...

Needle and Fred...

One person who has been ever present on the television is Fred Dinenage...

For Fred, he has been broadcasting to the south since 1964 now and is the main lead anchor for Meridian on their nightly news programme. But most people think of him of stand-in World of Sport anchor when Dickie had a dicky tummy or either that the light relief on 'How?' I don't think of him like that, he has been a part of the south's life since 1984 when he took over the anchor's seat and joining him Fern Britton from the Breakfast Time sofa.

ITV like their familiar faces as do the BBC, which such giants as Bob 'Sky Price is Right' Warman and Nick 'Midweek Sports Special' Owen as opposite anchors in the Midlands. But these faces are almost like a comfy dressing gown to wear after a hard day, we go to them to tell us what's going on and what's happening in the regions.

Suited and booted...

For instance in the Yorks and Lincs area is Peter Levy, an ex-radio DJ who moved into local television rising to become the main anchor broadcasting from Hull each night. But its his banter with Look North Yorkshire's weatherman Paul Hudson which makes it riveting viewing as the social medium of Twitter is being used to see what each other is doing and such they make almost salacious comments towards each other each night. Their twitter feeds are @peter_levy and @Hudsonweather

A warm front each evening....

They have been working together for such a long time, so it makes it OK but its almost edge of the seat stuff to see how far they can push it each night. So thanks to the world of satellite we are able to see these faces at work and thanks to the regions we are able to see a window on the world...